Today I’m here with a new friend, Sarah Walton. I already like her because we both showed up in Ubon and cozy sweaters. Yeah! That’s the best way to go.
Her Beginnings in a Poor Mormon Family
Growing up in a Mormon family with five brothers, Sarah fell in love with dance at an early age. She tried out for a dance team and was able to get on the team. However, when she received the list of costumes and found out their prices, her impoverished family couldn’t afford the costumes. “To see this list of costumes and their prices were almost like this out-of-body experience.” She thought that her dream would disappear.
Sarah was so dismayed, but she found a solution. She decided to get a job at the local mall to pay for her costumes. With her first paycheck, she put a deposit down for her costumes. “I was so proud of myself.”
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Because she didn’t have a bank account, Sarah had to go to the supermarket to cash her check. Her mom asked if she could get strawberries, and she said yes. Then she went to the service desk to cash her check and found that her mom and her brother had a cart full of groceries.
“I know she can’t pay for those groceries and it’s nothing crazy. It’s my brother’s favorite breakfast cereal, lunch meats for his lunches, bread, and strawberries.”
“I’m standing there watching this happen. And I know I can buy the groceries, or I can put the deposit on my costumes, but I can’t do both. So at that moment in my life, I decided I could take care of my family, or I could take care of myself, but I could never do both.” This was the turning point that led her to leave Utah and New York City to work her way up the corporate ladder.
Landing Her Corporate Job in New York City
Sarah became a corporate CEO in later years and had the gorgeous glass corner office. Her staff adored her, and her boss had complete confidence in her, but she was miserable. Although her family life was OK, her career wasn’t fulfilling her.
“I was terrified about what my boss was going to say. I was terrified of what was gonna happen to my staff. At this moment I knew I had to break this cycle.” Similar to the turning point she had in the grocery store, Sarah looked at the two paths in front of her and made a choice.
Stepping Into Your Power as a Woman
“There’s nothing more powerful for us to do as women than to learn how to deal with money.” Sarah is in the camp that we need to learn how to live differently and incorporate a profound mindset shift for us to correct.
“We would find the right solutions if women were in charge.” But unfortunately, there’s a clear imbalance in this world and no equal footing for women and men to get ahead based on their skill set. “When we look back to ancient civilizations where women ran the show, there are no weapons. There’s also no famine.”
“Women need to understand that money is the most powerful tool we have access to right now that might change in the future.” We can see that based on who’s in power. If we can teach women to be more selfish and take care of ourselves, we can make real change in this world. Sara says that instead of dropping bombs, we would be dropping food and medical supplies because that is who we are.
“It’s time for us to start our role in making massive, significant change using the power we have access to through money, but also through ourselves and in supporting each other.”
High Functioning Co-Dependent Women
Certain things work for a patriarchal society that does not work for women by definition. “There’s been a new termed. It’s called high-functioning co-dependence.”
As women, we can bounce back and forth between our two brain hemispheres, which can accomplish tasks so rapidly. It’s evolved from women taking care of children, which is why the feminine energy is so good at rearing children.
The co-dependence piece of high functioning codependents starts at a very young age for girls, especially when it comes to emotional upset. Because when we are upset, it can make other people uncomfortable, so they say things like, “Where’s my pretty girl, where’s my smile? And we learn very quickly that what we’re feeling doesn’t matter.”
Sarah says that women aren’t stepping up because we’ve been trained not to step up. We’ve been trained not to be seen as angry. Except white men are allowed to be angry, but no one else can feel male feelings.
For Sarah, anger is a warning signal for her to take care of herself. Even when someone else misbehaves, she doesn’t suppress her anger but realizes that she needs to make sure she is safe.
Healing Your Inner Conversation About Money
Understand that no matter what your conversation is about money, no matter how much you’ve healed, you need to understand that we are living with the mentality that women shouldn’t have certain things or be financially independent.
And you have a choice at that moment – you can ask yourself what needs to be healed, or you can run away and pretend that there are only two options. So the more that you open up to this way of thinking and the more that you expand your mind, the more you’ll start to understand is that money is infinite.
Giving Away Your Time for Free
“And then we start to hear, oh, you should just give that away for free because it’s what helps people.” Men never were asked to give their time or money away for free. Sarah sees this mentality with the women who volunteer at school as a mom. “They will show up day after day, because their time doesn’t matter, right?” Society says that what they contribute doesn’t matter, so they do it for free. “When one dad shows up, it’s like the freaking second coming and everybody goes crazy!”
The woman who’s shown up every day isn’t even acknowledged because she’s invisible. We have to understand that this behavior is perpetuated in our society. Our daughters and other women are watching society say that this behavior is the norm.
“You have to understand the backdrop you’re working inside of your mind.” You don’t even have to judge what you’re thinking, but be aware of what thoughts are moving through your psyche and which message has been delivered to you.
What’s In Your Best Interest When it Comes to Money?
“Think about what’s in your best interest when it comes to money and recognize that every single thing you own was once someone’s idea.”
They created, planned, and you bought their idea. Then you realize that you, too, can generate money at any given moment.
Selling Doesn’t Have to Be Hard
“The important piece to hang on to is that selling doesn’t have to be hard.” Take a few seconds to sit quietly and let ideas come into your mind. What do you love? Think of a problem you can solve for many people and build a business around that solution. Selling is the easiest thing in the world because you’re helping people, which matters so much to women.
“One of the most important things you can do is make sure you are proudly and accurately joyful. Share what you can do for other people at the top of your lungs! It’s the most exquisite gift you can give yourself is to be honest about how you can help other people.”
Hit Your Target in Life
What do you want to achieve in life? How much income do you want to make? Some people don’t know what they want to achieve.
“If you don’t have a target, you’ll hit nothing. This is real life, It’s not a practice round. Life is a game, so let’s go play!”